Calabar Sex Chronicles: Tangled Passion

I've experienced peace the last few months of my life, it could easily be counted as the best I've had so far, and I totally achieved this without being in a relationship. I used to believe I needed to be in a relationship to have a happy life, until I read this book, THE RULES OF LOVE by Richard Templar, and Rule 3 in the book opened my eyes. It was like the third rule was the only thing I got off the book. To further help my decision of not dating, I ran into Roselyn, a tall dark shiny angel that helped me out at the supermarket one evening I went searching Nutella Chocolate spread, something I ate at my friend's place and went in search of it at every supermarket in town but couldn’t find it. I kept calling it cocoa butter which confused the attendants to think I was looking for some sort of body cream, I shouted  ‘I don’t even use body the last supermarket out of frustration, when Roselyn who was paying for what she just bought turned around to look at me while  smiling. ‘but you said cocoa butter, she  said still smiling at me, at this time I only noticed her fine face and cute smile, that wasn’t enough to get me sprung, there are too many fine faces in calabar.  Then she further asked me what I was looking for, when I explained, she instantly knew it was Nutella I was looking for, she asked me to wait a minute, she walked to the shelf where it was being displayed I got 5 of it, then walked back to the counter, I had to remind her I wanted just one, she smiled and replied ‘don’t worry, I will take care of it, this way before you run out of it again, you will run into me again to help you pick it out’. That was funny but I couldn’t crack a smile.  A girl paying my bills in calabar?  That is as rare as seeing a celibate oil worker in port Harcourt.  Every girl in calabar is as broke as those in Enugu, and can never opt to pay your bills, even if its for a sachet water. That was the point I took interest in Roselyn, we started off with mild conversations, where I asked her name and she asked mine. Walking out to the parking lot, she asked where I parked my car, that was her first joke I smiled to, although she wasn’t joking. I told her I didn’t have a car and she offered to give me a lift. That was how I met five star rose, as I call her. She loved it when I call her five star rose or money bag.   Roselyn was so beautiful, if the quote ‘pick what you love and let it kill you’ was literal, I would pick Roselyn. But she had a fiancĂ© abroad who had done her traditional marriage, so I couldn’t even ask her out, she was a chartered accountant for unicem, the biggest company in calabr. Somehow, we settled for friends with benefit since I was about the Third rule of The Rules Of Love. Rose was a perfect messiah for a serving corper like me, free meals, weekend get-aways, night life, good sex and enough change in my pocket to leave my allowee untouched. My life was perfect until the next batch of corpers came along and brought the devil along.
The new set of corpers just left camp, and on one of our clearance day, one of them mistakenly came for clearance on a day set for us, Amarachi. Sexy as hell, pretty and super alluring. A bit smallish, but that was because she was one of those little graduates,  you know the type that got into school at 15, studied for 4 years and graduated at 19? Yeah! That type, unlike those of us that finished secondary school at 18 and got into the university at 19, then studied for 5 years and still managed to get an extra year for our carelessness. Seeing Amarachi, I thought to myself, this is the perfect woman for me! Young, inexperienced and controllable. Well that was what I thought at that time. I finished my clearance on time and was leaving early, same time Amara was told she has to come back the next day for her clearance. I usually don’t know how to walk up to girls on the road, because I don’t usually know what to say so I just walked past her with my fast pace, acting like I didn’t notice her to the bus stop to hitch a taxi. Somehow I lasted long enough at the bus stop for her to catch up and hitch same taxi with me. In the taxi, we got talking, that was when I found out she was the new batch and stayed in the same neighborhood with me, and also had no friends around since most of her friends in camp were posted to the villages. Perfect for me,I didn’t have to rush anything, I just promised to see her later in the evening after I got her number. I needed to impress her, you know, so I wont appear like just a corper. Most corper girls don’t like hanging with fellow corpers, because they know how much your allowee is, and how its barely enough for you not to talk of someone else, and girl love being taken care of. I didn’t want amara to see me as an allowee based corper. It was easy, being a sealord from campus made making friends for me easy, you just need to identify with the state chapter of any state you find yourself, either with the students level or the workers level, or both. Made life easy for me, I just had to call one brother to borrow his car to make first good impression, and we don’t play with making good impression, so that evening, I had my car ready and my pocket full. Coming to pick up amara,  her friends posted to the villages were around, three of them, they had an early clearance and decided to come look around in town. For a minute I thought I was doomed, then  I remembered, what are my brothers for? I called in a few, who drove to a spot I chose with filled up pockets to shut down the night. All they needed to hear was that there was enough girls to go around, my rugged brothers don’t play when it comes to girls. Anyway, long story short, that night was all about Amara being impressed with me.
So we kicked it off, sort of. She didn’t quite say yes, but we became so close that she found out about Rose and had the right to be jealous. Amara wasn’t giving me sex yet or even said yes yet but she wanted me to be faithful to her already. Well, I really cared about her, and I in order to show her I was being serious with her had to let my rose go, my five star rose. The sex, the money, the fun, all gone in  a package. I thought it was worth it until two months into dating Amara, no sex yet, just kissing and smooching, under the claims of seeing how serious I was with her. Someone I know isn’t a virgin, talking about an epiphany she had about no sex within the first six months of dating, which kind dirty six months? In six months I should have been done with service and gone home, so nothing for me? Sounded like a set up, my ears couldn’t believe what I heard. First six months?  This girl didn’t tell me this before I pushed rose away, what am I gonna do with kissing and smooching? It was like jumping from grace to grass! Not only have I lost the good sex, I started loosing more too, because I now had to pay for our hangouts which left me broke and you cant be broke and happy, so I lost the fun too. How did I get here? I was so furious with everything that I lost happiness in the relationship, and we got into fights so much she broke up even before the six months reached. Now I was at wits end again, no amara, no rose.
Luckily, I ran into a calabar sexy girl, Ekana. Good girl who schooled abroad and returned to Nigeria to work in her father’s company. Fine as hell, not so rich, to leave money in my pocket, but she pays her bills when we hang out, actually she insists, something she learnt abroad, thank god for abroad people shaa… she came with almost every package Rose came with, only that this time, it wasnt just sex. We were dating for good. Good sex too, did I mention good sex? Life was good again until I ran into Amara one night one of my rugged brothers who got hitched with her friend invited me out. After a couple of booze and moments of reminiscing and catching up, I told her I was now dating and all… she also on the other hand  found a guy that would date her without sex, so she was chilling. Somehow that night, it was unclear, but we started kissing and same girl  that wouldn’t have sex with me within the months we dated deemed it right to have sex with me in the car. I was surprised and in as much as I didn’t want to cheat on Ekana, I felt it was my God given right to have sex with Amara to cover for my losses for the months I spent with her without getting any. Problem was, it didn’t end just that night. There is this excitement that comes with sex when the sex is wrong. It felt like cheating sex was more fun than the usual, I started to understand why men have sex with their secetaries in the office, why men sleep with their house maids or their wife’s sister, distant cousins and all that. Wrong sex feels super great, the whole hiding and sneaking around, it was like having sex with a muslim virgin in the north, the andrenaline rush was too much and we enjoyed every bit of it. She was hiding from her boyfriend, and I was hiding from Ekana, we couldn’t have sex anyhow, we would plan it via sms because I was always with Ekana and she was with her boyfriend always too. And I couldn’t go out without telling Ekana where, so it was usually during office hours we would be at work, since we were corpers, we didn’t have too much workload, so we would sneak out of the office and rush home, either to my house or her boyfriend’s house because she was then living with him. Or on Sundays, while at church, we would sneak out while the sermon was still going on, rush home real quick for a quickie and come back before service was over. It was all fun and games for months, because we were never caught or suspected, it was too smooth until one day…



amanda moore said…
Lmaoooo.. If Nysc peeps read dis, they wld prolly scrap d program
Triny said…
Until one day what happened????? Don't leave us hanging Jor
Ada Ireh said…
Moreeee! Meanwhile, we've quite a number of rich girls in Enugu
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